Perry Glasser

Archive for February, 2013|Monthly archive page

SEQUESTER THIS, MUTHA!

In Business, Economics, Economy, Political Economy, Politics, TAXES on February 26, 2013 at 9:20 am

Dollar$ notes with awe the creativity of Weasels.

New readers of this column may want to check on the Prime Directives of Weasel Life, but the short course for those unwilling to click a link is that Weasels live to remain Weasels.

Yellow MongooseWeasel survival rests on avoiding controversy or culpability on any and all issues while sustaining the illusion that Weasels are nevertheless doing their jobs.

  • Controversy: any issue on which two Citizens might disagree.
  • Culpability: being perceived by Citizens as having been the architect of any policy that is controversial.

Weasel-life is therefore stressful. Elected to do a job by unsuspecting Citizens who pay for junkets to Caribbean islands, medical care for life, generous pensions, six-figure salaries, subsidized travel to and from Washington DC, jobs to dispense, and Pac-supplied dinners at Morton’s, Weasels are in a bind.

If they do the job, they are culpable. Someone is going to unhappy. If enough Citizens grow unhappy, they will lose the job and be forced to earn a living.

The usual Weasel tactic are:

  1. Lying – Why say what you believe when you have staff whose only function is to discover what constituencies want to hear?
  2. Absenteeism-why show up for a roll-call vote?TAX-CODE
  3. Absolutism-take an extreme position, never budge, and the lack of governance is always the other guy’s fault.
  4. Denial – Cornered Weasels who have committed an indiscretion often claim to have been misquoted, a tactic persistently less effective in an age when webcams and YouTube are on every cellphone.
  5. Vagueness and Obscurity – Any Citizen who has ever wondered why the Bill of Rights can fit on a few pages of typescript but contemporary legislation for such matters as the tax code require a pack of pages thick as a brick ought to understand this.

Dollar$ is happy to reveal why Weasels are calling next week’s scheduled economic event the sequester. An honest Weasel would call it “Diminished Services.”

There are no honest Weasels.

The Immaculate Delay.

The newest Weasel tactic, the Immaculate Delay, aka Kick the Can down the Road rests on Weasel contempt for the intelligence of Citizens whose memories often fail at recalling what they ate for breakfast. With the Immaculate Delay, a Weasel can claim to be doing the job with neither culpability nor controversy. Laws and policies go into effect on a time schedule, perhaps long after a Weasel is dead or retired. Death is a situation that has its drawbacks to be sure, but nevertheless serves the Prime Directive of Weaseldom.

Some are predicting that next week when the sequester goes into effect airplanes will fall from the sky and there will be an epidemic of cooties and Bubonic plague, pubic hair will unroot itself, and panicked Citizens will find the CDC has closed.

Doubt the apocalypse.

Also note that no contemporary Weasel need do a damn thing to avoid any repercussions at all. They can tsk-tsk the sequester as if it were a force of nature, like Katrina or Sandy, just something that happened, an act of God.

It isn’t.

It is an act of Weasel.

Karl Rove and the Walking Dead

In Economics, Economy, Rupert Murdoch, Wall Street Journal on February 16, 2013 at 12:27 pm
Karl Christian Rogue

Karl Rogue
No one knows what he was measuring.

Will someone please give Karl Rove a moment of clarity so he can finally grasp that his party lost?

Sorry, Karl, the bus left the station and you were not on it. Maybe you need new meds?  I offer the suggestion in friendship. Look around–you are in an office: that’s not the West Wing.

You have to stop practicing Zombie Politics.  Your ideas may be animated, but they are soulless, staggering, and only frighten children.

Rove and other Republican-hangers-on had a fair run for a generation, it is true. The Weasel Right waged successful class warfare by cooking up a stew of ideologies that garnered enough votes to elect a Parade of Stooges of the Rich able to parrot notions such as Trickle Down Economics without blushing.

Never mind that figures showed that the rich were getting richer, the poor poorer, and the heralded marginal investment that would be the engine of growth never materialized.

Cheek by jowl, the Christian Right, which might have been expected to heed Jesus Christ and engage in charity toward the poor and the weak, had been ushered into bed with the Weasel Right. The unnatural pairing saw a host of social issues that have nothing to do with social policy in a republic like ours become the bedrock of the Weasel Right coalition. Citizens know those issues were wearing thin.

Terrified of the Military

Weasel masquerading as a Mongoose

Lightning did not smite San Francisco, New York, Massachusetts, or other places that practiced tolerance and legalized same sex marriages. Americans lost no sleep worrying about the nice couple down the block who were  quietly committing sodomy in the privacy of their homes. Calls for smaller government rang more and more hollow beside calls for big government intervention in the bedrooms of Citizens.

If we cannot govern banks, at least we can monitor the uterus of a teenage girl in East St. Louis, right Karl?

For a professional weasel-apologist, there is no greater trauma than learning that the electorate is no longer buying last year’s bullcrap. Being a weasel-hanger-on is bad enough, but being a weasel with nothing to sell is a kind of death we would not wish on a zombie.

Karl!  It’s over.

On Valentine’s Day, Rove the Rogue and Weasel Hit Man did an analysis of President Obama’s State of the Union address. Since Rupert Murdoch’s Wall Street Journal would rather die than report good economic news while a Democratic Weasel is in office, the growing economy, the revitalization of housing, the uptick in merger and acquisitions, the record-high Dow Jones average, and other signs of four successful years of a presidency that saw Citizens voting for four more years of the same, they gave the Rogue some space to babble non-sequiturs.

Rove notes that Obama’s proposals were “liberal, stale, …, and often counterproductive.”

Well, geez, Karl, this is a speech, not legislation, and as soon as you get your head out of Weasel Fantasyland, may we hope you will notice that the President was re-elected by your fellow Citizens hoping for progressive change? That was a majority of your fellow citizens. That’s how our republic works.

Counterproductive? Well, yes, if you think the goal of government is to assist the Rich in destroying the Poor, Dollar$ supposes a liberal agenda would seem counterproductive.

Karl Rogue believes that Obama’s hope for good, middle-class jobs is a “flimsy” line; you’d think the guy was criticizing poetry. And he protests that anything positive in the past four years is “despite the Obama administration” an astonishing claim for a commentator who spent the first two years of the Obama administration claiming all good things were coming from the Bush administration. Some presidents are powerful; some muddle through. In Rogueland, results and reality matter far less than ideology. He also complains that Obama’s claim for deficit reduction is too high—an oddity insofar as Rogue doesn’t dispute that the reduction is, in fact, a reduction.

Best of all, while twisting in the wind trying to find an issue, any issue, Rogue lists the initiatives that will cost the richest nation on earth money (read “the Rich.”)

  • Subsidies for research into wind, solar, and geothermal power
  • Research into electric, biofuel, and natural gas powered cars
  • The redesign of America’s high schools
  • Mortgage relief (let’s get the poor out in the streets where they belong!)
  • Funds for mapping the brain
  • Fighting disease
  • Promoting advanced manufacturing
  • Federal aid for preschools

Oh the Horror!

Maybe American treasure would be better spent plundering public land for oil wells?

There are more, but Dollar$ grows weary of pointing out what Rogue seems to have missed:

THIS IS WHAT AMERICA WANTS!

 Puling notions of what we can, or cannot, afford mean only that Rogue and his ilk have different priorities.

Maybe they will find themselves a war to suck money from America? That usually works.

Eat the rich.

PITY THE WALL STREET JOURNAL!

In Business, Economics, Economy, Finance, Politics, Rupert Murdoch, TAXES, Wall Street, Wall Street Journal on February 11, 2013 at 7:56 pm

As Official Apologist for Buccaneers, The Wall Street Journal is suffering a bad case of the heebie-jeebies.  Owned by the wire-tapping Rupert Murdoch, the doyen of rumor and FOX News, the Journal of late has to endure nothing but the good news that contradicts what Buccaneers wish were true.

After all, how can the super-rich endure yet ever more humiliation, scraping by on mere millions.

Consider how Peggy Noonan and Karl Rove writhe in their columns. Rove, a Republican attack dog, on election night was so amazed that FOX had declared Obama had won the presidency, that he stormed into the news center’s datacenter.  He spins fantasies about how the GOP needs to persuade voters to cast ballots for candidates that have less than the best interests of their constituency in mind. Noonan, who writes brilliantly, seems unable to get her mind around the idea that the Reagan Revolution is over: the coalition of the Religious Right and the Rich has fallen apart because the rest of America favors Reproductive Rights, Gay Marriage, and all the other issues that would keep Big Government in America’s bedrooms while simultaneously demanding smaller government.

The Journal’s layout editors keep burying good news on interior pages. What else can they do? Admit that Murdoch’s agenda sucked, still sucks, and will suck in the future?

Let’s see, after 4 years in office, Obama was elected by a majority of Americans, not just a fluke of the Electoral College.  Nothing is more dear to the heart of Buccaneers than money, but at the Journal no one seems ready to admit that:

  • The Dow Jones is flirting with its all-time high,
  • America continues to create jobs, albeit slowly,
  • The Housing sector is coming to life,
  • The alleged rise in taxes is, in fact, the restoration of rates from long ago that were  lowered for an economic emergency by Bush—it’s time to restore normalcy,
  • Did we mention that the Bailout money Obama allocated at the beginning of his term has not only come back with a profit, but likely saved the jobs of hundreds of thousands of Americans?
  • ObamaCare is about to go into effect and will not bankrupt America,
  • We are out of one war and exiting another.
  • Oh…there has been no significant terrorist activity for years and Obama gave the order that killed Bin Laden.

Guess what, Rupert?  America is happy about such things.

buccaneer

DOYEN OF INDUSTRY

The Buccaneers are headed into the headwinds of Peace and Prosperity.  To get anywhere, they may have to turn around.